Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Randomize
