I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I wish i was in the wii world.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
She showed up to the party with a live octopus and a 30 pack that was already half gone
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
Randomize