Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
