Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
it was really awkward. it took him like like 2 minutes to realize who he was jacking off to. he stopped mid-stroke. such a small small world
i told you not to try chat roulette
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
