you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
His dick looked like E.T.'s finger. It scared me.
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
