Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Are they engaged or just dating? Girlfriends come and go but the memory of sex at the pool last forever.
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
