This dress was meant to end up on your floor
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
so let's talk penis.
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Suddenly I feel like all I did this summer was have sex in our apartment
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
