He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Ya know, sometimes when he kisses me in public I want to scream "HE DRIVES A PORSCHE!" so people watching understand that I don't have low standards, I'm just very materialistic.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
