How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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