He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
vagina is talking i cant
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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