I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
What changed your mind?
Being sober
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
So you'd go straight for a fat chick with cheese on her tits?
Yes.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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