It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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