Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
she says her boyfriend and her dignity are both out of town tonight
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
Apparently I think casual Friday means I can show up unshaven in yesterday's clothes and reeking of booze.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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