What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
