I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
We got so high we made milksteak
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
Me either. I want to get 'chase a stray cat through the neighborhood in my hooker heels' drunk. And it's your birthday, so you have to get 'best friend holding your hair while you puke in the bar bathroom and cry about your life' drunk. In a feather boa.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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