You smell like stripper and shame
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
Tell me why i'm looking through my medical records and the last thing it said about my labor was 'vagina was explored'!?
Randomize
