I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I think I'm going to wait until after Halloween to call off the wedding. No need to ruin my favorite holiday.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
