But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize