he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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