the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
FALSE ALARM! I didn't piss myself, I fell asleep in the shower and then drunkingly crawled into my bed
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Randomize
