He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize