imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
Also. After puking outside of the bar last night, some guy (who saw me puking) said I looked like Jennifer Lawrence, called me J Law, got my number and is now texting me. Who knew puking and rallying would do me any good
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Randomize
