i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
