the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Acid is not a monday night drug
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
Randomize
