He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
College: when you wake up drunk without pants and wearing a Cosby sweater
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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