Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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