before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
a search helicopter?!
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
