well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
The neighborhood cougar just purred at me while I was doing yard work. I’m terrified and tumescent
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