people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
We somehow ended up in Oklahoma. Nick's been crapping for two hours and I'm afraid to call a doctor because who the hell knows what sort of stuff goes down in the middle of nowhere. So not a great long weekend really.
Randomize
