i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
Listen, you can whine about not having a "red" wine glass, or you can suck it up and chug it from the vase like the rest of us. The choice is yours.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I think the cashier could tell I was sad. All I bought was penis shaped food and chocolate
We can get drunk and battle coyotes
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize