the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Please don't place wagers on my sex life unless you are giving me a cut. With my current sluttiness I feel like I deserve 40% for how much money you'll make
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
