drunk at some random house party. come get me. i thought i pulled my dick out to go piss... it was my left nut. im soaked.
tonight, alcohol would be proud of us
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize
