can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Graduating is kinda bittersweet. Now I'm gonna have to find another excuse to day-drink and sleep until 3pm besides "I'm in college."
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
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