well most of my day revolves around power hour
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
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