Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
Randomize
