if i'm ever as drunk as the girl in front of me... kill me.
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
I made out with him in the club and he endorsed me on Linkedin. My networking skills are off the charts.
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
Randomize
