i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
WHY WOULD YOU LET ME MAKE THAT MUCH NOISE DURING SEX IN RESIDENCE ?!
I tried to push your face into the pillow but then you kicked like a donkey.
I love tequila.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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