Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
i knew you were okay when you wanted to eat in the ambulance
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Lost and found: pink cotton underwear next to my bed and soaking wet Reebok socks or boxers in a plastic bag...in my fridge🤔
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
