I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
He uses pillows to masturbate.
Do vagina's smell?
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
In the hospital waiting to be tested for the first uti of the school year....I'm BACK BTICHES.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
50 year old business women like dick too. Come on she said you looked like Ricky Martin.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Drunk me also decided it would be funny to change all the passwords on my computer last night. Now I can't log into anything.
OF COURSE I NEED TO KNOW I MUST KNOW EVERYTHING
YOU ARE NOT OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
I AM OMNIPOTENT AND YOU HAVE TO DEAL WITH THAT
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