I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Randomize
