This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
