i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Randomize
