Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
