In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
I'm covered in pickle juice. Why do you people leave me alone?
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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