whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I just realized that with the new snapchat update / emoji sticker thing I can now use easily use emojis to cover my boobs in nudes.
Randomize
