I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
She wasn't to happy when she went to put her shirt on and it was covered in cum I just looked at her and said collateral damage....
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
