"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
I think I ruined his life by managing to get his initiation nickname for his frat to be "Whiskey Dick" but I still wish herpes on him and his fugly new girlfriend.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Randomize
