I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
