we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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