If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
