Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Currently eating a pop tart in my underwear waiting for the washer. Not one of my prouder moments.
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
Randomize
